BUTS and Excuses.....
It is now approximately 5 months since I have moved back to Singapore! How time has flown past but I still find myself in the same rut! Things have moved but not much though!!Over the last couple of months, I have come out to a total stranger who happen to have just come out as well. So he is still discovering but he is definitely miles ahead of me!! I have done a course about self awareness that should have expand my true self and seek the so called life path but somehow like I said earlier on I still feel trapped. I am more comfortable of my feelings about guys. I have accepted that I am trully attracted to guys especiallly the good looking ones but I am still comfortable making new friends with guys but not expecting any more except for the basic friendship.
I am more comfortable now with my very close friends about me being gay and we have decent conversations out relationshiops. In the past, I just shudder when I hear about gay relationships but I secretly harbour this feeling. Longing to be touched and hugged. Longing just to be love and accepted. Something pure.... Maybe one day I will find that love. Just maybe....
Anyway, it has been a long day! I realised that I have a lot of BUTs in my sentences above. Maybe this reflect my so called life which is full of excuses and BUTs.
Labels: Gay
posted by Maximus Leo @ 11:51 PM
5 Comments:
Do as what makes you feel comfortable. You don't have to raise your limit or anything :-)
I on the other hand got bashed (in a nice way though) at a homo bar by friends last night about my gayness and all. I think I have become so dirty that would be impossible to cleanse!
Hi, do you know what happened to jon's blog? the angel4love.blogspot.com? I'm a fan of yours and his blog but now his blog is no longer accessible.
What an excellent post! Thanks for sharing...sounds like you're on your way to feeling better about who you are.
So go out and start meeting up with them, my friend :)
Happy Coming Out, dear. It is not like that people nowadays are shallow. They are more accepting than we think. In fact, secretly, I think they like to know that they have gay friends.
Max, don't mind if I use the space here to talk to Tommy.
Tommy, I have to seal my blog because my students discovered it, and I am having a slight problem with a few of them.
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